Well first off I don't feel proud about what I'm about to post at all or what I want to, I never was able to be free when I was much younger... you know what I mean? Have my Cake and eat it too. Mmm how delicious that cake looked too and how it smelled.
Maybe that's why I'm so high strung?
God damnit even in the comfort of my own blog I'm starting not to be able to relax and just say what I want to say. Oh well fuck it. Probably for fear of loosing what little I have now especially for how hard I worked for it. God all the things I missed out on my own fucking fault because I was never able to admit to myself that it really was ok.
So odd I feel like this wild jungle boy at heart (not really but just saying shit at this point) but at least the closest I can get to the feeling is back then I felt as though a savage amongst well dressed higher class people. So I suppose I never strayed far from the heard yet still remained as a wolf if that makes sense.
I've lead a life of restraint... I'm tired of being denied or restrained... I want things given to me for once... without a fight.
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